Stress-Free Housecleaning

Written By: The Good and the Beautiful Published On:

Is your daily to-do list feeling overwhelming? Dishes piled in the sink, toys scattered on the floor, loads of laundry to do, and dinner to make—and homeschool the kids? Like many homeschool parents, your list of household tasks never ends. Jenny Phillips shares some effective tips for stress-free housecleaning—tips that you can also apply to de-stressing homeschool. Join Jenny in her home as she shares some principles that she hopes will help you find more peace in your own life.

Stress Management

Learning how to manage stress has been a big focus of my life recently. This is how my house looks today. Believe it or not, it doesn’t stress me out. This is because cleaning the main area of my house is a “not right now” item. Right now I am finding refreshment this morning through watering my houseplants, having tea, and studying the Bible.

I have learned that there is so much more to do every day than I can accomplish, and one thing is much more needful than having everything perfect—and that is being at peace. One way that I find peace is by having “not today” items, “not right now” items, and “just this much today” items. Prioritizing my tasks this way has really reduced stress in my homeschool and in homemaking, which are two of my very favorite things in life.

It is easy to get overwhelmed when there’s rice spilled on the floor, dishes need to be done, the garden needs weeding, the playroom needs cleaning, and a sweet child’s handwriting needs a lot of attention.

  • A kitchen sink full of dirty dishes | The Good and the Beautiful
  • A laundry basket full of clothes | The Good and the Beautiful

Not Today

Most days, we just cannot accomplish all the things that need to be done, and that’s okay. But if leaving certain things undone makes us grumpy and unhappy, that’s not okay. We can decide that some of the things that need to be done can be “not today” items. For example, we can say cleaning the playroom is a “not today” item. Then, instead of being frustrated every time I pass the playroom that day, I just know that it’s not supposed to get cleaned that day. It will get done, but not today, and that is totally fine. I probably want to clean up the rice and do the dishes, so the rice doesn’t get all over the floor and all over the house, and so I have dishes to eat on. But what about the garden that needs an entire hour of weeding?

  • A living room with a child sitting at a small table with toys out all over the floor | The Good and the Beautiful

I Can Do Just This Much Today

Well, I can’t put everything on my “not today” list. I mean, some days I can. But it can be helpful to take some things and say I’ll do “just this much” today. So, for example, you could say with weeding: “Weeding the garden is a ‘just this much’ item. I will pull 100 weeds today, or I will pull weeds for 15 minutes today.” Something that is easily achievable and not overwhelming. The garden weeding will get done within a few days that way. 

And what about your child’s handwriting that so desperately needs help? It’s easy to be stressed if you think of the whole load of what needs to be done for the desired end result. But we can’t do it all in a day anyway, so we can say, “We will do this much: We’ll work on G and H for 10 minutes today.” Or, “We will do this much this week: We’ll do one extra handwriting sheet each day.”

Another part of this approach is making sure that we don’t keep little but stressful things as “not today” items for too long. Different things stress different people out. For example, some people get stressed when beds are not made. Every time they walk by their room or their kids’ rooms and they don’t see the beds made, it really stresses them out. For other people, not having beds made doesn’t stress them out at all.

  • A child's pink room with an unmade bed and objects on the floor | The Good and the Beautiful

  • Notice what makes you feel stressed. Take note of what makes you sigh or feel annoyed. For example, maybe you’re stressed that your child’s handwriting is poor, or that your kids always leave their shoes in the family room, or that you never have energy to do science at the end of the day like you want to. What is bothering you? Write those things down and then fix them. We don’t have to keep being frustrated by all of those things. And sometimes the things that frustrate us are so quick to fix, but we just don’t take the time to stop and take care of them.

Helpful tip: Make a list of all the things that bother you or stress you out. Pick one or two and address them. Leave the others in the “not today” list for another time.

  • For example, I had a pile of books on my closet floor recently that needed to be put in a bin that was up on my closet shelf, but I was always in such a hurry that I just didn’t put the books away. Every time I would go into my closet—several times a day—the books on the floor made me feel stressed. When I finally stopped weeks later to put them away, I counted how many seconds it took me to put them away—25 seconds! I had probably walked in and out of that room 80 times, and so 80 times I felt frustration for something that I could have just done in 25 seconds.

  • A child's room with a neatly made bed and nothing on the floor | The Good and the Beautiful

What About Big Projects?

Obviously, some projects are a lot bigger, but often there are things we can pick up quickly, causing less stress than seeing that mess over and over again.

Another example, for the past six months in my home, our mudroom has just been a disaster—shoes everywhere. So finally, I just ordered baskets quickly on Amazon. I made some index card labels with the kids’ names on them, and we threw all the shoes in the right boxes, and the mudroom has been so organized since then. It really was only 15 minutes of effort, and yet again, I have probably walked in and out of that room 900 times—literally—in the past six months, and so 900 times I felt frustration for something that I could have just taken care of in 15 minutes!

Categorize your priorities:

  • “Not today” items
  • “Not right now” items
  • “Just this much today” items

Mother and son preparing food in kitchen | The Good and the Beautiful

These are simple things, but I hope they will be helpful to you. When you feel your stress rising, consider saying this is a “not today” item, or a “not right now” item, or an “I will do just this much” item.

Helpful Tip: When a project feels too big, baby steps can go a long way!

May you be blessed. May you have joy in the incredible roles of motherhood, of homeschooling, of homemaking. You probably don’t realize just how much those things are refining you, molding you, and bringing you so much joy if you really look around and see it.

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